Fight Or Flight? How About Kindness And Curiosity?
A plea to change our evolutionary trajectory.
Ever since we climbed down from the tree, or crawled out of the cave, or slithered out from the primordial ooze, we humans have been prioritizing our own happiness. In fact, one could argue that we climbed down from the tree, or crawled out of the cave, or slithered out from the primordial ooze BECAUSE of happiness.
Happiness is a driving force.
Darwin was inspired to recognize evolution1 by seeing the Galapagos Tortoises. The tortoises of James Island had (and still have) a lower neck-hole on their shells. The tortoises of Hood Island had (and still have) a raised neck-hole. The differences were an evolutionary necessity based on the food available to the tortoises on each island. James Island had food growing close to the ground. Those tortoises kept their heads down. The food on Hood Island grew on bushes—a little higher off the ground. These tortoises had to keep their heads up and thus the shape of their shells adjusted for this behavior.
This phenomenon is often referred to as “survival of the fittest”. Having a tight neck-hole when your food requires you to raise your head up means you are going to have a rough go of things—you’re going to be unhappy. It could be argued that evolution is dependent on the “survival of the happiest”.
SURVIVAL OF THE HAPPIEST
The theory that evolutionary progress is made by organisms adapting to their environment to maximize their happiness.
Speaking of evolution: we humans evolved as a tribal species. We needed each other to survive. We leaned on each other to help with hunting, gathering, raising our kids, and fending off saber toothed tigers. Cooperation (much like the shape of a tortoise shell) allowed us to be happy. And, more broadly, happiness for the group meant you, as part of that group, were also happy. Individual traits that work toward group happiness such as kindness, generosity, honesty, and empathy were (and are) considered an evolutionary imperative within the group.
Troublingly, the same tribalism we humans have evolved with also gives us a significant capacity for envy and hate. Especially when it comes to other tribes. Envy and hatred breed conflict. Yet conflict is also rooted in happiness (in a way). Conflict happens for two very broad reasons:
To take for yourself what makes someone else happy.
To force what makes you happy on someone else.
It’s as if happiness must be shared equally, even if I have to kill you for it.
As we are all too well aware, being in a conflict allows us great leeway in justifying the conflict. We can overlook a lot of questionable behavior from our tribe like cruelty, greed, dishonesty, and apathy toward other tribes as long as it protects our own happiness - the happiness of others be damned.
While history is littered with tribes rising up against each other to either force happiness from or upon another, the eras of relative peace were ones when tribes realized that cooperating with other tribes was a way easier and less bloody path to happiness. Cooperation between tribes allowed for the exchange of knowledge, resources, and even DNA (bow-chicka-wow-wow) across an ever larger group of people. Turns out peace brings happiness. Who knew?!
If we’re going to continue to evolve we need to confront our evolutionary contradictions: That what we find most admirable within our own tribe: kindness, generosity, honesty, and empathy can be viewed as a weakness in another tribe. And the traits we find grotesque: cruelty, greed, dishonesty, and apathy can be justified as a strength when in conflict with another tribe.
FIGHT OR FLIGHT
We humans are chock-a-block with evolutionary quirks. Being suspicious of anything that is unfamiliar has served us well for millennia. It has prevented us from petting the large kitty-cat with the oversized teeth, eating strange looking berries, and pulling your uncle’s finger (even after certain assurances were made).
We are hardwired to fear what we don’t know. It makes it easy to look across to another tribe, go with our gut, and take defense against whatever it is they represent. From that position it is far too easy to let hate take over. Once hate festers it’s an even easier jump to justify conflict. Yet conflict, as has been proven time and time again, takes too much energy to maintain for a nominal gain (if there is a gain at all). Fight or flight is a primitive and faulty way to view the world and has, frankly, lost its evolutionary edge. In fact, it’s a disadvantage.
I quite understand that simply willing humans to make an evolutionary leap is beyond my very limited control. It would seem that kindness and benefit of the doubt provide a stronger evolutionary advantage over knee jerk reactions to perceived threats. Given that kindness also has known health benefits2 - not the least of which is increased longevity - it seems like a no-brainer. How do we make this happen?
How do we adjust our shells?
IF YOU LIKE THIS
please press the ❤️ at the top or bottom of this page,
click the 💬 to leave me a comment (I’d love to hear from you),
or if you want to go nuts, hit the 🔄️to share this on your own socials.
All of it helps others to find this post, and me to find other readers.
ADDITIONAL READING:
I dislike using the word “discovered” as it sounds like evolution didn’t exist before it was recognized. Also I opted not to use the word “theory” as it tends to invite discussion about the validity of a thing based on people not understanding what “theory” means.
6 Benefits of Happiness According to the Research : Heart health, Stress relief, Immune strength, Healthier lifestyle, Reduced pain, & Increased longevity.